We’re a week away from the last day of classes for Jessie and with one year of mothering a college student under my belt – I feel… okay. It was a rough year in a lot of ways, but it was also a really, really good year. She learned a lot about independence and self sufficiency, taking control of her own happiness, figuring out what she wanted and how to get it. It was not always easy – it was never easy. The homesickness never really went away, she just got used to it. I adjusted to life with an adult daughter. Learned to not offer advice, but to listen to her vent and know that my role is to encourage her, validate her, and know with absolute certainty that she’s got this. Because she does.
I feel like this was also a year with a lot of changes for Sam and Julie as well. Sam is finishing up his freshman year, and finally getting all of the services he needs in place. Only to realize that we’re running into another year, and another round of trying to figure out who will provide those services next year. It’s going to be a battle. Every.single.year. And as I’m typing this, I know it’s going to be a battle all the time for Sam – to get the accomodations he needs, the support he needs, the skills… But we’re getting there. Slowly, slowly, but it’s happening. Thank God he’s doing so well academically. Thank God he’s doing so well physically. The spring allergies are doing a number on him, but his overall health is so much better now that he’s on the migraine meds. It’s still a process, adjusting meds, adding new ones, taking some away… but overall, I think we’re on the right path.
Julianna is starting prep for her bat mitzvah. And middle school. She just turned 12 the other day, and I’m slowly starting to come around to the realization that I no longer have any little kids. I mean, I knew that. I don’t have any babies, any toddlers, preschoolers, and pretty soon, I won’t have any elementary school aged kids. I have teenagers, young adults, even.
I’m both wistful and excited about the changes. I love watching Julie grow into herself. I love her empathy, her snark, her sense of humor and her intelligence. I love watching her create and grow and be who she’s supposed to be.
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