Melissa Anne Cohen

(no order and far from all that I love about her….)

1.  She can nod yes and sign no – and instead of shaking her head no, the way most toddlers do, she waves her hand in front of her face, as if she’s saying “Oh, no, no, I couldn’t possibly….”
2.  She enthusiastically agrees with me when I carry her back to bed, if I ask if she’s read to nurse and go to bed.
3.  She stops sometimes, mid nurse, to grin up at me and wrinkle her nose.
4.  She’s also developed a little sign language way of telling me when she wants Marc.  She points at the palm of her hands, because that’s where Marc has his blisters from working out.
5.  Her eyes are not green, not grey and not brown.  But a beautiful combination of all three, coupled with gorgeous brown curls and a perfect little face.
6.  She loves people – loves being in the middle of everything, and is happy to go with anyone, as long as they swoop in and scoop her away from me.  If she’s distracted, she’s fine.  But if she can see me or Marc, forget it, she wants just to be with us.
7.  She wakes up every morning delighted by everyone.
8.  I held her thru every single one of her naps, until she was about ten months old.  Then she, all of a sudden, started napping on her own, and now sleeps for hours on her own.  She’s a walking (okay, crawling still) endorsement of attachment parenting.
9.  She’s got a “happy bounce.”  You can tell how enthusiastic she is about anything by the level of the bounce.  A bounce coupled with waving arms means that she’s ecstatic.  She bounces a lot 🙂
10.  She’s just starting to talk.  And pull herself up more and more.  She’s on the cusp of everything, and I can’t wait to see what she’ll do.

(again – no particular order, and I could easily have come up with a whole bunch more)

1.  He can play for hours, by himself, with a bunch of blocks and little army/firefighter figurines.
2.  He adores his daddy, and really, really wants to be just like him.
3.  He makes his baby sister light up whenever he walks into the room.
4.  He’s my lovebug boy – and starts every morning with at least five minutes on my lap, giving me “Sammy Love.”
5.  He loves trees.  A newly cut down tree is enough to bring him to tears, and he’s honestly concerned about the trees when the weather isn’t good.  He’s my little druid.
6.  He idolizes any guy in a savior role – policeman, fireman, soldier, etc.  If it’s a guy, doing something to save or protect others, that’s what he wants to be.
7.  He really, really loves Jessie’s best friend Glennys.  It’s just a sweet, pure kind of love, he just flat out adores her.   I know he’s only four, but holy moly – if he still feels that way in twenty years, Glennys is going to be luckiest woman in the world….
8.  He is by far my easiest child when it comes to sleep. He just goes to sleep when he’s tired and wakes up when he’s ready.  There’s no stress involved, he just does what his body wants and my main job is just to let it happen.  He never fights sleep, he never wakes up too early.  If he’s tired, he sleeps until he’s done.
9.  He is unabashedly antisocial.  He flat out doesn’t like people in general.  In specific, there are people he likes a lot, but big groups?  Forget it, he hates it.  And as much as it’s challenging at times to deal with, I have to admire his honesty and conviction.
10.  He’s so incredibly sweet and loving.  Earlier today, he told me that I was the most beautiful Mommy ever.  Out of nowhere, and believe me, today is not one of those days when I’m pretty.  My newly short hair is half caught up in a ponytail, I was wearing Marc’s old Patriots shirt and still had on yesterday’s mascara.  But in his eyes, I was beautiful.

(disclaimer – these are in no particular order, and I could easily come up with a million more…)

1 – She’s incredibly emotive.  You name it, she feels it 150%. She’s all heart, my girl, and I hope with all my heart that she is always going to be this softhearted.
2 – She’s unthinkingly maternal.  She doesn’t think about whether or not she should pick up a crying baby, she just does it.  She knows without ever being told how to soothe and comfort her siblings and does it automatically.
3 – She’s got this completely off beat fashion sense.  She’s far from obsessed with her appearance, but has this inimitable style that’s uniquely her own.
4 – She loves to read, and is always in the middle of at least two or three books.
5 – She hugs all of our relatives at parties.  She hugs everyone when we get there, and hugs them all goodbye when we leave.  I don’t have to tell her to do it, she just knows they want her to do it, and does it every.single.time.
6 – She’s intensely spiritual.  She really, really thinks about God and the universe, and does her very best to learn all that she can.  But there’s a level of spiritual awareness that you have that’s beyond what you can be taught, and my daughter is stuffed full of it.
7.  She frequently uses Hebrew in casual conversation.  It’s confusing, as I don’t speak it at all, but I love that she really enjoys learning and using the skill.
8.  She’s heartbreakingly beautiful, with big chocolate brown eyes, the most perfect nose and a rosebud mouth, gorgeous skin and the prettiest hair I’ve ever seen.
9.  She’d rather listen to the soundtrack to the Sound of Music than the soundtrack to Camp Rock.
10.  She still crawls up into my lap, and fits as perfectly there as she did when she was a seven pound infant.

There, I’ve said it.  I really don’t.

Marc’s out tonight, delivering pictures over to Charlotte Cohen’s house (long story).  And all three kids are asleep, and I’m taking advantage of the time and cleaning my little heart out.  I decided to spring clean out the kids’ playroom downstairs, and have gleefully filled two big bags full of broken toys, lost puzzle pieces, etc, and created an even bigger pile of toys that Marc will crunch down and make smaller to fit into still more trash bags.  But there are odd noises, and even though I know intellectually that I’m fine, I’m still totally freaked out.

It doesn’t help that Sam’s green light saber keeps randomly going off.  He left it out in the rain (actually Kolbe did, and we found it today) and I thought it was broken when Sam brought it over crying because it wouldn’t make noise or light up anymore.  But no, it was just wet, and has apparently, over the course of the day, dried itself out.  Only now – it just keeps going off.  It crackles and sometimes lights up, and keeps making that ominous “I’m going to kill you” noise.  I’ve tried shutting it off, but it keeps magically turning itself back on.  Either that, or it’s possessed by a ghost.  I mean, it’s probably just that the wiring is all weird because it was out in the torrential downpours yesterday – but that explanation begins to wear thin when it’s just me.  Alone.  With a light saber that keeps going off.

Just all the time.  I don’t know if it’s a function of having Arie and the kids staying with us temporarily (although if it was, it hasn’t decreased the activity level now that they are gone) or if it’s just part and parcel of having a large family with young children.  I feel like Marc and I are always about three steps behind where we should be, and constantly striving to catch up.

Of course, blogging does not help me get stuff done.  I know that.

All is calm and delightful in my world today – Harrison and Jordyn and Sam are outside playing happily, racing around the backyard playing some sort of game that doesn’t make a lot of sense to me, but they all seem engaged and happy.  Julianna is sitting on the living room, having found her bag of alphabet blocks and is very busily picking one up, examining it, putting it down and picking up a different one.  She’s so cute, all brown curls and oddly enough, greenish eyes.  I’ve got dark brown eyes, and somehow just assumed that all of my kids would get them.  Marc’s got lighter, hazel-ish eyes, but definitely more brown than green, and Sam’s eyes are grey and Julie’s are some sort of indiscrimate color that defies categorization.  It’s not grey, it’s not brown, it’s not really green either.

I’ve had a really nice weekend.  After a solid week of rainy dreary misery, the sun finally came out yesterday and it was glorious.  We’ve got a bunch of cool yard toys, chalk and bubbles and see saws and those odd little car things that the kids can ride in, and they were outside all day long.  Today, we’re back to cool and cloudy, so I’m extra grateful for the sunshine yesterday.  I kept Aria here, Aralyn and her two boys went down to my sister’s house for the weekend.  My kids are extra lucky, because on this little street, there lives one girl who’s a year older than Jessica Mary and a little boy who’s just a couple of months younger than Sam.  They were both over here all day yesterday, plus my cousin came out with her baby daughter and her mother.

Today, it’s just us – Marc’s out playing D&D; with his friends for a few more hours, and I’ve got Aria and Julianna both sleeping like angels.  Sam is watching cartoons and Jess is working on her homework.

I’m really, really focusing on being happy.  I feel like I’ve been super stressed and frustrated lately, and I’m mentally reminding myself to slow down and enjoy what I have.

There’s a zone you get in, when you’re caretaker to a lot of children.  It’s less about spending quality time with any one child, and more about crowd control.  If that makes sense.  With Arie and her three staying here, plus the two I sit for on a regular basis, and the neighbors and stepchildren swinging in periodically – I’ve really had to dig deep to pull out patience and grace.  And of course, all of the kids are somewhere different, developmentally, and require completely different levels of care and attention and discipline.

Jessica is, above all, the easiest and happiest of all.  She’s calm and relaxed, going to bed with no problems, doing her homework, bouncing off to school.  She scoops crying babies, helps Kolbe with his schoolwork, entertains Sam – she’s my wonder child.  I can’t brag enough about how well she’s handling this, I’m so enormously proud and impressed by her.

Kolbe is adjusting well to kindergarten.  I’m looking at him as a model for Sam, and a flashback to the first year I sent Jess off to school.  He started out great, but today, was not at all happy about going.  I’m watching Arie go thru the stress and trauma of shipping a kid off to school when he wants nothing more than to stay home and I know how tough it is.  Not only do I know how tough it was for me, I also keep thinking in the back of my mind of how tough it will be in September when Sam starts school.

Sam is struggling to get used to having everyone here.  I feel so bad for him, because I think it’s hardest on him.  He’s such a good, sweet boy – and he really feels all confused and bewildered by having everyone here all the time.  He and Kolbe are either getting along well or absolutely awful.   He really loves Aria, unless she’s bugging him, in which case, he can’t stand her.  He’s the kind of kid who thrives on alone time at home – and that’s in short supply these days.

Aria – at two, is hands down the most challenging.  She’s also the cutest – I flat out adore two year olds.  Almost all the time.  She’s all about testing limits, doing her best to help out and failing miserably most of the time.  She loves cleaning up, and will often intentionally dump out a cup just to have the thrill of wiping it up.  I’m relearning about how to discipline a two year old, with time outs, positive reinforcement, consistency, etc. It’s just a different world, with a two year old.

Miss Julianna Ruth – hold the phone – is actually, sort of, almost standing alone.  On her own two feet.  She’s done it twice now, of course, only when I can’t see her, when she’s alone with Marc.  But yesterday, I was sitting on the floor with her, and she stood up totally supporting herself, balancing with just her hand laid on my shoulder.  It was awesome – and terrifying.  I’m used to her not walking.  But I’m not that far away from having my own toddler soon.  Can you imagine?

I think there’s a whole bunch of factors, obviously.  But seven was a tough year for us – more so for me.  I didn’t like the sassy, sarcastic side that came out, the temper tantrums were tougher, it was just a rough year overall.  But so far, being eight seems awesome.  Jess is overall much, much happier, she’s easier to get along with, seems to handle difficulties easier, finds joy and happiness so much faster.  School seems to flow better, she’s really thriving and so much more content.  I love eight.   I got her school pictures today – and she’s so grown up, I was really kind of shocked.  How did my tiny pretty bouncy baby turn into this tall, thin, gorgeous serious girl?

Sam is almost five.  He is.  I know.  It still shocks me.  Five.  My baby boy is almost five years old.  He’s going to be a kindergartener in a matter of months and I’m dreading it already.  Not only because I’m pretty sure he’s going to scream hysterically thru the first month, but also because he’s been at my side for his entire life and I’m going to miss him like you wouldn’t believe.  Who’s going to bake cookies with me?

Speaking of which… Julianna won’t let me bounce her anymore.  She’s always LOVED laying across my lap, bouncing to sleep. Even when she didn’t sleep, she’d doze into this hypnotic sort of state that was peaceful and relaxed.  And suddenly, everytime I try to lay her across my knees, she starts twisting and arching her back.  She’s in the process of giving up the second nap, and if she gets one really good nap around eleven to two, she’s good for the day and out for the night until around eight thirty or so.  Last night, she was up twice, and has had a wretched time napping today.  It’s so hard, with everyone here and the chaos that just exists in the house these days to maintain a consistent schedule, and she WON’T FREAKING BOUNCE TO SLEEP ANYMORE, which is frustrating, as she also won’t nurse and is rambling around the living room, just hollering at everyone who looks at her wrong.

I don’t mean to complain (but since it’s my blog and all…), I’m going to anyway.  It’s pouring today – and the five day forecast shows nothing but rain.  Forever.  And with six kids here right now – the thought of not being able to ship them outside freaks me out just a little bit.   That’s a whole lot of yelling that’s going to be going on for the next week or so…

I’m not handling this well.  It’s hard, having everyone staying here, and I’m feeling overwhelmed and worn out.  I love my cousin and her kids are so stinking cute most of the time, but I’m praying for patience and grace.

In other news… Julianna Ruth is sleeping away, Jessie is cuddled up with her daddy and Samilicious Boy is downstairs playing with the little neighbor from across the street and Arie’s oldest son.  My house is the place where all the kids seem to congregate (other than the thousands that are currently living here).  At any given time, I’ve got my three, plus Arie’s three, two of the neighbors, two stepdaughters and Glennys.  Mostly, I love that – I love that the kids all love playing over here, I like the thought of being the house where all the kids hang out.

I just have to keep reminding myself that.

Sorry I haven’t been updating lately – my cousin and her three kids (6, 2, and six months) have temporarily taken up residence at my house.  I’m used to a certain level of insanity – I do have three kids – but the past two weeks have been above and beyond anything I can describe.